Hot Sauce Committee Part Three: Green Sauce

Bottom line up front: Is this even hot sauce?

There are a lot of things going on this this sauce without even opening the bottle. Exactly what is “Green” hot sauce other than green? Lots of chilies? Green peppers? The name alone is confusing. Look at the bottle. It’s got Japanese branding all over. Cherry blossoms. Mount Fuji. A rising sun. That imagery pulls me in a completely different direction that is better served by soy or tamari. Even the Bulldog sauce would be more welcome.

When I opened this bottle I got that smell that is standard of all these sauces, vinegar. My expectations are tempered already.

I put it on my already bland food and did not really notice it at first. So I put more on. Pretty soon the bottle was empty. I used the entire bottle without noticing the flavor of the sauce. It was that bland and unflavored. Sure, there was a tiny amount of heat, but what normally stretches over a week was gone in one sitting.

A bland, nothing sauce is almost as bad as a sauce that does nothing like this one. One that provides mixed messages and ultimately delivers on neither.

Hot Sauce Committee Part Three: British Red

Bottom line up front: It’s ok. Albeit bland and adding nothing to the experience.

What does British food taste like? Without looking at the bottle, I would have guessed fried fish or sausages? Nothing readily comes to mind, unless we’re talking Indian cuisine. I mean, the elephants are a dead giveaway.

When I opened the bottle I got a decidedly non-British or Indian smell. Prunes. Can’t explain it. A strong whiff of prunes. As I ate it, I got the feeling I’d been here before. The flavor was oddly reminiscent of the Fiji one prior. I would not be surprised if all these sauces start from the same base with additions that are considered “worldly”.

The bad thing about this sauce is the flavor, or lack-thereof. It was just bland. It was mild heat and mild flavor. I’ll give it points for not detracting from the overall taste of the dish, but it came to the party with nothing.

Hot Sauce Committee Part Three: Fiji Mango Habanero

Bottom line up front: Don’t come here looking for strong mangoes.

I’m always wary about putting fruit into things that are supposed to be savory and vice versa. Bacon or spicy jam? No thank you. Jello with meat? Sorry, I’ll pass. Aspic, look it up. You won’t be pleased. The Fiji Mango Habanero had a big mountain to climb with my preconceived notions on sweet and savory. Not a bad thing in and of itself, sweet and savory trail mix? Delicious. Salted caramel? A ten.

I put it on some pretty bland food which I’m want to do so I can get the full flavor. A little mango hits you right away, but it’s very faint. Almost as if the makers put some habanero hot sauce in a cup and set it on a counter. Then they grabbed a fan and put it in front of some mangoes next to the sauce and waited for a while. That’s how faint the mango flavor tastes. The star of the show is habanero and it’s not necessarily my thing. There’s a point where spice outperforms the flavor. I’m not sure where the line is, but this sauce crosses it. Too spicy and not enough mango flavor.